#Hermitcraft Portal au

[spicyavogato]

*sigh* Oh portal AU my beloved...

[ask-hc-portal-au]

Hello! My name is Mumbo Jumbo and I am an intelligence sphere tasked with keeping the test subjects alive. Don't ask how well that's going...

My name is GRIaNS, I am the Genetic Recreation Intelegence and Neurotoxin Specialist. You can call me Grian.

I'm Scar. I'm a test subject here. I'd rather not be testing, but I haven't quite escaped yet.

OUT OF CHARACTER INFO - DO NOT SEND ASKS BEFORE READING

I am -not- connected to Hermitcraft or Valve and take everything I say as a headcanon. I am not actually the any of these characters.

This is a crossover between Portal 2 and Hermitcraft. Grian is GlaDOS, Scar is Chell and Mumbo is Wheatley. I may bring other characters in, such as the personality cores, but I don't have hc members casted for those yet so I will be coming up with them as you send them asks!

My main is @pseudocyance and I also run the @ask-moonbig ask blog.

I am someone who has played Portal 2 over and over and I have watched the unauthorized musical many times. All plot can be taken from either game, the Lab Rat comic or the musical.

This is not a shipping ask blog. I have ships in Portal and ships in Hermitcraft that I like but this blog is not either of those, so please don't send asks about those.

This is OOC

*this is actions*

This is Scar

This is Grian

This is Mumbo

TAGS (all are specific to avoid main tags of fandoms)

Posts where Mumbo speaks - #Mumbo core

Posts where Scar speaks - #Subject Scar

Posts where Grian speaks - #The Intelegence

Intercom announcements - #before the fog

Rebloging art/posts about this au - #Aperture's test files

All posts where people speak - #ask the hermits of aperture

Anon asks with the anon character's name - #Subject (anon name)

Post with any OOC notes - #Black Mesa Representative

will add more as needed

RULES

no nsfw (I'm a minor)

no spamming asks

sign anons with emojis or a name

cursing is fine, I think it's funny. If you're a repeating anon please let me know if you are uncomfortable with me swearing to you. (I have the language of a sailor, I apologize)

Thank you for reading! This is my favorite au and while there are many combinations for castings this is the most common I've seen so I will be using it.

[pseudocyance]

Now I'm curious about zed as Wheatley, both as an art rec and why him

- 🔥🦋

(Art reqs post)

(Tango as Chell post)

Pretty low quality doodle today, sry, I don't have a lot of creative energy rn /nm

I really like the dynamic between Zed and Tango and I think Zed being all obsessed with experimenting in s9 works with Wheatley really well. I can also see Zed going in on the evil bit really hard. Playing it up to playfully annoy tango.

Z.E.D. personality core, with horns bc he's a sheep apparently

[1kk4ku]

hermitcraft portal au i made up :o3 (my character placement idea for this au is scar = chell, mumbo = wheatley, and grian = glados 🫡)

[shasskor]

I had a vision

[severevoiddragon]

File 001: Mr. Scar Goodtimes

Real name: We're still not sure, and frankly, we're too afraid to ask.

Job: CEO and Founder, Former CEO

Notes: CEO and Founder of Apeture Science, Mr. Scar Goodtimes raised this company from the ground. From making shower curtains to our new scientific advances, he has led our company to prosperity.

More writing under the cut!

Statement from Mr. Goodtimes: "Hello, all you investors and test subjects, Scar Goodtimes here, CEO and founder of Apeture Science. You might be wondering, "Scar, what possessed you to buy hundreds of dollars of moon rocks?" And the answer would be: Science! Just some good, ol' fashioned Science. Cleo, tell the Lab Boys to see if ground up moon rocks can do any Science."

Additional Note: We're not sure how Mr. Goodtimes came into possession of billions of dollars, considering he spends them all almost as soon as he gets them. The stock ratings are awful, and had it not been for Mr. Goodtimes' fortune, Apeture would have been bankrupt within its first two months.

Note from Mr. Goodtimes: "You know what I think will help achieve our aim of a big, beautiful tomorrow? AI. Artificial Intelligence. Cleo, can you get the Lab Boys working on that? Thank you. You see, I want to try and put myself into a computer! Wouldn't that just be great? Then I can get to see that great big, beautiful tomorrow. So, I'm getting the Lab Boys to work on that now! Say... That diamond looking moon rock looks suspiciously tasty..."

Additional Note 2: Mr. Goodtimes has begun eating the moon rocks. We hope this has no health concerns.

Additional Note 3: There were, in fact, health concerns. While we cannot get a direct statement from Mr. Goodtimes at this moment, he has stated that he wants Miss Cleo Zombie to "run this place" in the event of his premature death, and that the "Lab Boys" should "Stick her in <his> computer" if needs be.

Additional Note 4: It is with a heavy heart we report the death of Mr. Scar Goodtimes. As his tragic death occurred before the completion of the "GLaDOS Project", Miss Cleo Zombie will take Mr. Goodtimes' place as CEO of Aperture.

<\end of file>

[thesoupbird]

happy valentines day @severevoiddragon !

this is pearl from her hermitcraft and portal au, go check it out!

made for @mcyt-valentines event!

[archivist-of-the-void-institute]

hello? Is somebody receiving this transmission?

My name is Scar. I am a test subject in Aperture Sciences. I have not been able to escape, but I need to get out. This place really drains your sanity after a while and trust me, I've been here for a while.

There are robots here. They talk to me. Sometimes it's hard to distinguish the robot's voices from the talking in my head.

But please, i need help. I cannot spend another day running through identical white hallways and almost dying "in the name of science". I don't think I'm going to make it out of here alive.

@ask-hc-portal-au

Yes,your being received,I'll help any way I can. Do you know where you are?

[mine-sara-sp]

yoooo that portal AU Zed design looks AWESOME, do you have any clearer sketches of it?? i wuld like to see Him

Have Tango too! They are both very fun to draw in this (these sketches are actually from august 2021, they're oooldddd and the animatic is too!)

I only made a bunch of art for it tho, the au belongs to @redstone-sun so if u wanna know more u should ask them :>

[imflyingfish]

I know there's that portal au where Chel is Grian and Wheatly Is Mumbo but I also think that one hermit that would do really well as a Chel character would actually be Tango,

[aquaquadrant]

I’m in LOVE with your Hels to pay au!! Thank you so much for writing it!!

Has anyone ever asked Tango about his cuffs? Has anyone offered/tried to help him get them off? I imagine it would either be a funny montage of increasingly wild attempts OR just absolutely heartbreaking.

(sooo funny story, i saved the first ask in january bc i wanted to write smth for it… but then the second one came in before i got around to it… then the third… so uh. yeah. here ya go.)

~*~

“i like your cuffs, by the way.”

tango freezes, and even though xisuma has only just met the guy, he can immediately tell something’s off.

hermitcraft’s newest member is far from ordinary; a blaze hybrid with sharp teeth and blackened claws, red eyes that dart around nervously and squint at the sun, like it’s too bright. he didn’t even seem to know what a golden carrot was, when xisuma gave one to him.

the shackles around his wrists are just the frosting on the cake. xisuma had assumed it was part of his, er… unconventional style. but tango’s reaction- and the small links of broken chain still dangling from the cuffs- make xisuma wonder.

“what… uh, what do you mean?” tango asks, his tone forcibly light. oh, he’s anxious- ears flat, shoulders hunched likes he’s expecting an attack.

xisuma shrugs. “your cuffs, they’re just really metal,” he says casually. “it’s a cool look, is all.”

“oh.” tango blinks. the relief is evident in his expression, but he only relaxes slightly. “oh, right! thanks.”

while xisuma hasn’t been the admin of hermitcraft for very long, he’s been around long enough to tell when a player is running from something. but that’s none of his business. that’s why they come here, isn’t it?

“anyway,” xisuma says, “that’s about the end of the tour.” he lifts a hand to put on tango’s shoulder, then thinks better of it, folding his arms instead. “you just lemme know if you need anythin’, alright? anythin’ at all.”

“right, yeah.” tango smiles, but it doesn’t reach his eyes. “thanks, i’ll- i’ll keep that in mind, yeah.”

~*~

“jeeze, you ever take those cuffs off?”

tango freezes, and even though impulse is still relatively new here on hermitcraft, he can immediately tell he’s crossed a line.

it’s only been a couple weeks since a random portal abruptly appeared in front of impulse, taking him to a world called hermitcraft. according to his fellow hermits, that amounted to an invitation from the universe- which is how they all join.

he’s spent most of his time working on a quadruple witch hut farm with some of the other redstoners, and tango’s been a bit of a puzzle. he’ll be standoffish or even outright defensive at times, but then seem inexplicably drawn towards impulse, asking strange and not-so-subtle probing questions. of course, whenever impulse tries to address this, tango brushes him off.

“oh, these old things?” tango says after a moment, his brief panic quickly swept under the rug as he flaunts his cuffs. “why, do you- am i not pulling them off? too much?”

“no, no, they’re cool!” impulse assures him. “it’s just, don’t they get in the way when you’re doing delicate redstone work? seems like a bother, that’s all.”

tango huffs a laugh, but he’s also eyeing the nearest exit. “nah, man, th- it’s part of my look! my uh, my brand, as some might say. can’t go without ‘em, you know how it is…”

that’s not the reason. impulse can tell. but whatever the real reason is, it’s not his place to push tango to talk about it. they’re still getting to know each other, so if it’s anything more than a simple fashion choice, impulse is sure he’ll find out sooner or later.

“ooh, okay, gotcha.” impulse nods sagely. “branding, very important. well, if you ever change your mind, i’d be happy to take them off your hands- uh, literally and figuratively, i guess,” he chuckles, rubbing the back of his neck. “cuffs are pretty ‘in’ for demons, you know.”

tango laughs too, though he’s already turning away, back to his work. “right, yeah, i- i’ll keep that in mind.”

~*~

“can you actually not take these cuffs off?”

tango freezes, and even without the spike of panic through their soulbond, jimmy can immediately tell he’s said something wrong.

it’s been about a month since the double lifers voted to end the death game. one month since jimmy and tango made their relationship official. and as amazing and wonderful as it’s been living on the ranch, jimmy’s starting to get the sense there are a few things he doesn’t know about tango.

he hadn’t meant anything by the question- just genuine curiosity. they were kissing, tango’s hands cupping jimmy’s face, and when he’d reached up to cover tango’s hands with his own he’d felt the cool metal of the cuffs, and the question just blurted out from his mind. gosh, he really does ruin everything.

tango recovers quickly. “whaaat, you don’t like ‘em?” he grins, casually stretching his arms above his head so the cuffs jangle around his wrists.

jimmy hesitates. the panic he felt through their bond has faded, but that doesn’t mean it’s not still there “well, sure, it’s just- y’know, i realized i’ve never seen you take ‘em off.”

tango blinks. “you- what, don’t you think if i wanted to take them off, i would’ve?” he laughs, putting his hands on his hips. “i mean, it’s not- we have metal-cutting technology, you know.”

oh, duh. jimmy feels silly. tango is far from helpless- if those cuffs hadn’t been a conscious decision, he surely would’ve figured out how to take them off by now. or, jeeze, he could’ve asked anyone on his server full of technical geniuses to help out.

“right, right, of course,” he says sheepishly. “sorry, i wasn’t- i do like how they look, i- i was just wonderin’. but uh, you know, if you ever did wanna take ‘em off… i mean, i’d still like you plenty without them,” he jokes.

“you’re good, you’re good,” tango hums, draping his arms around jimmy’s shoulders. “i’ll keep that in mind.”

~*~

tango sits alone in his room, claws curled around the cuff of his other hand.

it’s just simple iron. it wouldn’t be hard. all he has to do is reach for his inner fire, concentrate, and let the metal soften in his grasp. even if he heats it too much- so that molten iron drips over his skin like water- he’s a bit more fire resistant than the average player, he’d be fine. it’d only take a couple seconds for each one, and then he’d be free of them. forever.

it’s been nearly ten years, for hel’s sake. he’s lost count of how many times he’s been in this exact situation before, wanting and willing so much but being unable to bring the flames to his fingertips. if he even thinks about it, it’s suddenly like he’s back in the farm, icy wither rose numbing his veins, a haunting voice ringing in his ears.

‘just the cuffs on his wrists there, and he stays put like the good creature he is.’

tango wants to be good. he’s been trying so hard to be good. but what if he can’t trust himself? what if the only thing stopping him from reverting back to his old ways is the illusion of control maintained by these shackles?

who is he without them? would he be someone that his friends still cared about? would jimmy?

he’s too afraid to find out.

tango lets go of the cuff, the familiar weight of metal dropping back onto his wrist. he can try again another time. so long as he has his fire, he still has the option. he’ll do it someday.

so for now, the thought retreats to its little shadowed corner in the back of his mind, safe for another day.

~*~

[spicyavogato]

Hermitcraft Portal AU WIP

[ask-hc-portal-au]

*a strange recording begins playing over the intercom*

Hello! My name is Grian X. Mycel. I'm one of the heads of office here at Aperture, second only to The Boss. I got to this position through lots of hard work and years of learning. My job is being an assistant to The Boss and overseeing the neurotoxin production, two jobs that are more similar than you might think.

*laughing to himself*

Anyway, I'm making this recording for the lab boys, they said they wanted to capture some voice samples from me. Standard procedure for employees apparently. I don't pay too much attention to what they're working on since it's not my job, but maybe we're getting new voice recognition software for the doors! These keycards are terrible.

Sorry, I'm rambling. Hopefully this recording is long enough for them. I've been doing all sorts of strange testing for the lab boys recently and it's been taking up so much time. I need to do my job!

This is Grian, signing off.

*the recording ends*

[pseudocyance]

Hermitcraft portal 2 au casting for Wheatley poll

I may or may not be *craving* this au and I need to put it out into the world but idk who to cast

I think the other characters will be based on who gets Wheatley tbh

My reasonings for each option:

Mumbo - most people's pick for this au, mostly for accent

Scar - talkative, plays incompetence, "bloodthirsty"

Tango - the image of Wheatley saying -skadoodler is permanently seared into my head now

Grian - more serious vibe, could be a normal/watcher switch when he turns evil

Jimmy - bad boys au instead of hermitcraft

EDIT: PLEASE READ BELOW FOR MY AU IDEAS

tbh I don't personally love Wheatley Mumbo bc it seems to obvious and I don't see it personally wise

but here are some of my casting ideas for various versions of this au:

-

Bad boys:

GlaDOS - Grian

Wheatley - Jimmy

Chell - Joel

-

Caroline - Xisumia

GlaDOS - Evil X

Cave Johnson - Keralis

-

Aperture = Convex:

Wheatley - Scar

GlaDOS - Cub

-

Wheatley - Tango

Chell - Zed

-

Space core - Iskall but instead of space it's Joel

Or alternately

Space core - Joel but instead of space it's etho (ethogirlcore)

-

GlaDOS - Doc

Chell - Grian (buttercups)

-

Life Series au that @artemfluid and i came up with:

Chell - Martyn

Glados - Grian

Wheatley - Jimmy

Factcore - Scar

Rick/adventure core - Skizz

Kevin/space core - Joel

Cave - Mumbo

[1kk4ku]

Your portal AU has already taken over my brain, why have you done this to me specifically (joking)

IM SOO SOO SORRY FOR THE SUPER LATE RESPONSE BUTTTTTTTTTT BUTTTTTTTTTT AASDFGHDHJKFAASDL THIS IS SUCH A BIG COMPLIMENT .!!!!THANK YOUAGGGHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH

im So sorry to tell you that i have no idea what to do with this au or whether i might expand this au further cause it was most just for funsies but i will let you know that i Do think about it occasionally so hopefully new ideas will pop up in the future .. here are my wheatly!mumbo and glados!grian designs (+ a bdubs turret and a bdubs companion cube) that i drew a while ago for now....!!! :o3

[shasskor]

What if Mined made Mumbo into GLaDOS?

Literally chuffed to bits